The past couple of days have been pretty busy for me. I had my first weekly reports I did on my own for my own floor. Typically there isn't too much to write. You update any changes or problems and weekly weights. If a child has a special conditions that needs something else to be monitored you note that as well. What is more time consuming is that often the nurses use this as a way to record some of the child's history so that they will have a record of it some day. These reports will eventually be added to their charts. In their charts there are stores of their medical documents, but also any pictures of their time here growing up and playing and any other things pertinent to the past we have. When the children come to us from the orphanage they usually have no records given to us and when they leave they take none of our charts or records. The children very much so do not belong to us. We have some meds they give us to give to the children that they may or may not tell us what are. They can come in at any point and give a child anything or take them away for anything and bring them back, or just permanently take them back with no notice. This follows with the records as well. We keep all of these things so that some day there is a chance a child will be able to get a little of their history or that their new family can have a little bit of their child's past. When children are adopted the families are not told this is available. It is only if they somehow know that their child spent time here that they know they can ask for these. A lot of the records kept here are never received by anyone, but they are here, just in case. It is both sad and beautiful, like so many things here.
So when I went through and did my reports this week it was more than the "stable, afebrile" that it could be. I tried very hard to get to know all my 36 babies well enough to put at least a couple of notes in their report about being able to smile, or loving to play with a certain friend, or funny habit of growling, or how they love to blow kisses or that they love cuddles or being tickled. Some of the children are harder than others to write about because they are very limited in their abilities. Some children are not able to do much more than lay on the mat and move their eyes. While others will at least look for their special friends and smile or laugh when they see them. Some are incredibly easy to find things to write about because they are always crawling up to you and getting involved in everything. There is a great deal of diversity here, and it is a special task I have been given that may or may not make a difference some day. We were talking over lunch about the importance of history and how much those little stories about your past mean to you. Many of these children will never have them. I look at these children and know how much they mean to me, and I think of how important those stories I have of them are to me and how much more so to their families or themselves some day. Mariah shared a story of a little boy today that she received here from an ayee at another orphanage that had been with him since his parents had given him up. She was his mama for almost 4 years and when she gave him to Mariah she had to explain to him that she wasn't his mama anymore, Mariah was going to be his mama now. He took that to heart and now looks to Mariah as his mama, as many of the children do. It is heart breaking to know that someday he might never know that there was a lady that raised him through the first years of his life and loved him like a mama, and broke her heart to turn him over to us. I think it is extraordinarily important to know that throughout your life you were loved, and that the people that love you are part of who you are. I don't know that any of my chartings will make it into the hands of families or children one day, but I am going to do my best to keep that up, no matter how busy I am, just in case they do. I think I am going to start writing letters to some of the children to put in their charts so they can read them some day and know a little of their past and know that they were always important and loved. There won't really be anyone else to remember and share their stories from their time here once they move on. I know each of them has touched my life and I would like them to have the chance of knowing that some day.
Now I will share a couple more interesting cultural things. I am definitely embracing how there are very few things that are rude in the states that are rude here. Where we ate today the benches were little couches you could put your feet up on or stretch out on without anyone giving you another look. I also got noodles which you can slurp and shovel off of your plate for easy access in eating, lol. A couple of differences at restaurants is the to go bag I might have mentioned earlier. You do not get a box, but a bag, even for soup. Also food comes out as it is ready, not all together. Kelsie and I were done eating when Mariah's sandwich came and it was 20 minutes later before my coffee drink came. It is also very rare to find a restaurant that serves individual plates here. Most things are ordered with family serving sizes and shared between a group. Rice is also seen very differently. While most Americans eat rice with all of their Chinese food, it is rare to serve it with your meal here. Rice is a poor mans fare to fill them up when they can not afford any more dishes and are still hungry. To them, you eat your food and have rice at the end in case you are still hungry. At a formal expensive meals a host will never serve rice. Mariah was explaining to me that the price of a meal builds your guanchi with someone. Basically it is your friendship basis and strength of relationship. Everything is based on that in this culture. You always go to the same tailor or use the same driver because you have built up guanchi with them and want to continue to do so. You can give or owe favors based on how much guanchi you have amassed over the years. Business men hosting a business meal will serve a very expensive meal to help build guanchi. When conducting business it isn't the people with the cheapest prices you go to, but those you have the most guanchi with.
Chinese people are also culturally very blunt. You never have to question someone's true thoughts about something. They will quite casually tell you if they think you are looking fat today or if something looks bad on you. Kelsie and I went down to the kitchens yesterday to grab dinner since I wanted a safety net if they tried to talk to me. When I walked by they told me I was very pretty. Kelsie jokingly told them she was pretty too, but they informed her that, sure but not as pretty as I was because I was whiter. I didn't realize how useful my lack of tan this summer would be :P It just made me laugh because no where could you get away with saying something like that in the states, besides which that very fact is the opposite of what is desirable in the states.
A final difference I will note is Chinese restrooms. I have mentioned them in passing, but I can not emphasize enough what an impact the experience has. If you are are at all squeamish, do not ever enter Chinese restrooms. I had the distinct pleasure of trying out one at the mall, which is a apparently a nicer one. You walk in to be met with the delightfully damp floor and lovely aroma and leave with questionable things, literally, squishing between your toes. There is no soap or toilet paper. The toilets are the squatty potties with their accompanying questionable soup surrounding them. You can choose then to approach the sinks, if you so desire, but the stuff growing in them and lack of soap makes the decision a little pointless. Over all the entire experience is unique and...special to say the least. Even my strong stomach and easy going disposition were...impressed.
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